If you ever went to jail...

[ShoesEvenShinier]

The Tim Donaghy jail thread got me thinking...what would you do to survive prison? Guess lots of variables at play here...is it a country club type place or a federal pound-me-in-the-ass penitentiary? Also depends on what kind of sentence you are looking at. Just doing a year or 2 or looking at life? I would think if you're a lifer you'd be open to losing your humanity a little more to stay alive.

Would you willingly become someone's bitch to survive? Join the Aryan brotherhood? Or just go the old school route and kick someone's ass much bigger than you on day 1 to send a message?

 

[novabball2]

id do what Ed Norton did in 25th hr and get my face beat in prior to my first day of jail. then i have no idea where id go from there. but id rather die than become a dudes sex toy.

 

[Novacatt94]

 

[TommySalami]

id do what Ed Norton did in 25th hr and get my face beat in prior to my first day of jail. then i have no idea where id go from there. but id rather die than become a dudes sex toy.

Yeah but didn't Norton ultimately go on the run rather than go to jail?

As for me, I'd just never wipe my ass. Yeah it may itch all day and lead to God knows what kind of medical issues but it would make my ass less appealing to pound. Of course that won't help if I was forced to perform oral sex at knife point.

 

[novabball2]

no that was his fathers fantasy. then they cut back to norton and his dad heading to the NY prison.

probably Spike lees best movie.

 

[TommySalami]

no that was his fathers fantasy. then they cut back to norton and his dad heading to the NY prison.

probably Spike lees best movie.

Agree. That and Summer of Sam. When he gets off his black power soapbox, he's a decent director.

 

[nardibynature123]

Agree. That and Summer of Sam. When he gets off his black power soapbox, he's a decent director.

This and that.

 

[NovaTras22]

his reboot of Oldboy was beyond awful. not a wise choice there.

 

[Ninetynine5.0]

No matter how thin you slice the garlic, it wont dissolve in the pan with a little bit of oil. It just won't.

 

[Novacatt94]

Artistic license. No need to be so concrete.

And it liquefies in the pan, it doesn't dissolve.

 

[Mainliner II]

I'd dig a hole in the cell for 20 years......tunnel out........and sand down an old boat in Mexico, while waiting for my pal to show up.....

 

[ShoesEvenShinier]

Oh a Shawshank reference. How novel. Didn't see that coming in this thread.

As for Spike Lee, to be fair, Do the Right Thing and Malcolm X were both outstanding. The rest of his "blame Whitey" movies, you can keep.

 

[TheFoyeEffect]

I would try to convince my high school basketball superstar son to attend the governor's alma mater so that I would get my sentenced commuted.

 

[Mr. Wade Garrett]

id do what Ed Norton did in 25th hr and get my face beat in prior to my first day of jail. then i have no idea where id go from there. but id rather die than become a dudes sex toy.

I love when people are like, "No way id let some dude pound me in the ass if i went to prison."

Like youd have a choice. Much tougher guys than you have made the same resolution and had it not work out.

Watch Sleepers.

 

[ShoesEvenShinier]

I love when people are like, "No way id let some dude pound me in the ass if i went to prison."

Like youd have a choice. Much tougher guys than you have made the same resolution and had it not work out.

Watch Sleepers.

Sleepers was a bunch of 12 year olds being raped. Bad analogy.

 

[wcburrs87]

Sleepers was a bunch of 12 year olds being raped. Bad analogy.

Watch American Me.

 

[SnottieDrippen]

I weigh 150 soaking wet. I'd probably have to kick the bucket. Zero chance if someone "chose" me

I have some friends who have served sentences and they have never brought up anything about sex in jail. I'm not about to bring up the topic either. Makes me think it's less common than we think though.

 

[NovaNation1188]

From what I understand, there is significantly less prison rape if you don't go to a maximum security prison. Chances are you aren't going to maximum security facility if the following applies to you after committing a crime:

1) You are white
2) You are college educated
3) You don't have prior felonies
4) You didn't murder someone

#2-3 dramatically affect which type of prison you go to.

 

[NickleDimer]

I would just constantly tell everyone how great Sam Hinkie's every move is. They would want to murder me within a week.

 

[novabball2]

i hope i never have to find out what prison is like. im getting married next year, that's the closest thing ill ever get to prison.

 

[Full Marx]

From what I understand, there is significantly less prison rape if you don't go to a maximum security prison. Chances are you aren't going to maximum security facility if the following applies to you after committing a crime:

1) You are white
2) You are college educated
3) You don't have prior felonies
4) You didn't murder someone

#2-3 dramatically affect which type of prison you go to.

See any rape when you did time for pounding rolling rock outside that Wawa?

 

[NickleDimer]

i hope i never have to find out what prison is like. im getting married next year, that's the closest thing ill ever get to prison.

 

[novabball2]

A little happens everywhere, Philadelphia Shot Gun edition.

knuckleheads

http://www.philly.com/philly/news/breaking/20150623_Seven_people_shot_in_Kensington.html

 

[nardibynature123]

I would just constantly tell everyone how great Sam Hinkie's every move is. They would want to murder me within a week.

 

[BAC111]

" have some friends who have served sentences and they have never brought up anything about sex in jail. " Burrs - Dirt Dog.