Originally posted by Novacatt94:
Originally posted by JoePaturnedABlindEye:
I hear you and it can be fun to walk the boundary and see what's possible. Is she married too? If you do decide to try and make this happen, do your due diligence on her? Is she stable? Have as much to lose as you? How is her access to your family, friends? Would she ever tell them etc?
Need to know as much as possible and go with your gut. It's a risk assessment basically. It's not 100% but the more intel you have the better.
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Last time I talked to her which was over two years ago she was engaged. When I said congratulations, she seemed nonplussed. I filed that away in my memory bank but didn't remember it until now.
Due diligence: Stable.... depends on how you define that. Professionally, yes. She is a hard worker. Stellar reputation, although she is a bit outspoken and somewhat of a live wire. Presents herself well. She is a fitness freak. Rollerblades, a runner, tennis, etc. Very athletic. She is Asian, forgot to mention that. Not sure if that is here nor there, but I know that she is tight with her family. She works a second job for the family business.
I was really close friends with another girl in the office at that time, we were "seen together" a lot, but most people never mentioned it, at least to our faces. Except her. She'd ask me on a fairly regular basis, "How is (my friend) doing?" which I found odd. One time she tried to arrange a lunch with the three of us. My other friend did not feel comfortable and declined.
Does she have as much to lose? Not sure because I am not sure about her current status. Her message to me did state that "
I moved to....," not "
we moved" which I find to be curious.
Access to my family and friends: Zero. Our worlds do not cross.